I often find myself in situations where I question my friends, their loyalty, their kindness, their gestures. I feel this mistrust in these come from many betrayals that have occurred in the past. Little things happen, things people do or don't do that makes me wonder if true friends really exist.
Over the years I've come to realize that friends come and go, only few remain constant, and those constant may or may not be deep friendships, nevertheless they are present in my life. I've come to appreciate each friend for what they are. One is the friend you call when you feel like sharing a funny joke and you just know they will get it and laugh with you. The other is the one you call up to meet up, because they are always open to step out and have some fun. Some friends you never see but have long conversations over the phone or chat. And then there are those who make you feel comfortable enough to go over their house unannounced and they will welcome you.
But who is the true friend in all of these, who will go the extra mile to help you out, to be there when things are rough, or tell you the truth in your face when you most need to hear it?
This is my quest.
I have a few friends in the neighborhood but there is always one that leaves me with a bad feeling in my gut, not that this friend does anything bad to me, but I feel a sense of insincerity that I cannot shake, a friend can be a wonderful host, and a great conversationalist but when you walk away, you feel empty.
Perhaps it is I who is the insincere one, not realizing that I really do not have much in common with this individual but I insist on keeping the connection for what ever reason I still don't know.
What is true friendship, and can true friendship come in one's life for a period and disappear or should true friendship last forever - that is my question.
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